Behind Closed Doors

WARNING: THIS BLOG IS NOT FOR THE PERSON WHO HAS A PROBLEM WITH TALKING ABOUT SEX...

What's the freakiest thing you've ever done? Like, the stuff that you wouldn't even dare whisper around your mother for fear she would look at you and tell you "go 'long and get de belt"? Come close and whisper it inna meh good ear...

No? You're not going to tell me? GOOD. I don't wanna know.

And neither should everyone else. The thing is, your sexual experiences should be a private encounter. Granted, every girl has a girlfriend or two that they mention a freaky thing or two to..."Gyrl...I didn't even know they had tongue game like that..." or my dudes who talk to their friends..."Shorty went to college on the kid...an excellent brain like that deserves a scholarship..." I mean, we've heard it all before. And yes, sometimes (myself included) we drop it down low in the club and leave the next person wondering if they'll drop it 'like that' on them in the bedroom. But if you're like me...I don't leave the club with anyone. EVER. It's just a dance to me...a fact that I make very clear.

Sex is not a private manner nor should it be confused with intimacy, an act and word that typically become interchangeable when people talk about them. If they call you at 2 and pick you up at 3 and you are on your way home at 4, then you are having sex (and probably a 4 am'er) and you might be interested in telling your homie about it. If any of the aforementioned happens and there is kissing and conversation involved...you might want to reconsider mentioning it. Again, the lines can become blurry sometimes, but there is a definitive difference between sex and intimacy. Intimacy should be a private act between two consenting individuals. I really do believe that. With intimacy, you tend to share more of yourself - and that SHOULD be private. I know that Sommore joked about "being able to spot that n*gga at the Million Man March"...but honestly, I don't want to meet your man or woman and question whether or not it's safe to kiss them on the forehead that particular day. Let me have my fantasy...

Moving on from that, two people who are intimate CAN and do have sex from time to time. But even in that, there is intimacy: when you branch out and try new things, there is a certain level of trust implied within that willingness to try something new. That in and of itself is intimate. It is something that I myself hope to experience. Experimenting with your partner is quite a bit of the fun and a testament to how much they actually trust you. But more on that in another blog...

The point to today's ramblings is to keep your private affairs behind closed doors. Next thing you know, they wind up in somebody's status and I wind up either laughing at it or SMH...

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