If you've ever grown up in a West Indian household, you know that either your mother, your father, or one of the many elders that you grew up with at some point was bound to be the one to beat you when you got out of line. Now, granted, when I say beat, I don't mean abuse (though I will readily admit, in some folks cases, it was rather borderline), but I mean the phrase that every kid growing up in the islands or anywhere with nice foliage dreaded..."go 'long in de back and get de switch..." In America and in more recent times, it was amended to, "go and get de belt..."
Those of us who grew up in this fashion, with a certain level of discipline and respect for people, tend to agree that this level of discipline is severely lacking in modern day society. And, of course, I am not saying that this is limited to Caribbean culture...but most would argue that growing up in a traditional, old school Caribbean household somehow instilled you with the values and discipline you needed to be a productive adult. Or perhaps that's just good parenting.
Some people argue that spanking is ineffectual. I, of course, completely disagree. Spare the rod and spoil the child and all that. It is with all that said that I wished I had a switch this morning. I'm on the bus again this morning, minding my own business, reminiscing and what have you, when this older African woman and two boys get on the bus. One boy manages to find a seat, the other is left to stand. I started to get up to let him sit, but I changed my mind when I saw him snatch his hat back from the woman and then subsequently smack her with it when she tried to take it back. Oh no. You can stand, buddy.
As do the things that I see on a daily basis tend to do, of course it got better and better. This kid...I couldn't even believe it. He said whatever he felt like saying to who I realized later was his grandmother. This kid cursed her out, his little brother out, his mother out when his grandmother called her to get him to calm down, and then, when this woman on the bus called him out for it because this kid's antics were insane and had the entire front of the bus captivated, he cursed HER out, too.
I was floored.
Only on TV have I seen such blatantly disrespectful behavior directed toward an elder, and as I said before, the whole front of the bus was captivated to the point of not being able to speak. All I wanted to do was pick up my hand and back hand him...or go get de switch. Where was the discipline in his life? How, at 10, did he manage to get so unruly and blatantly disgusting? Clearly time out was not the answer for this child. He didn't care what anyone had to say to him.
What do you all think about disciplining children, particularly the ones that completely gone over the deep end?
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Go and Get De Switch From De Back...
2 comments:
Sigh....you are such a foreigner!!
I never got beatings as a child (shocking I know, lol), but I think it all comes down to knowing your child. I never got beatings, one, because my behavior was never that extreme and two because I was the kind of kid that cried simply from a stern raised voice. My father knew that there was no need for belts or switches because just the tone in his voice had me a wailing, apologetic, shameful mess.
However, there are some situations and some children that just need to be beat. The might've spit on you like some of the Supernanny kids do to their parents or they might not respond to just stern voices and need something more intense to get them in line. Whatever the style I don't think beatings should be the very first choice, try a few things out first and see what works for your kid, but if all else fails....there is nothing like a good ole switch!
I am...hence caribbean ramblings!! LOL
It's true though.
Post a Comment