I took my little girl school clothes shopping today. Spent 200 dollars easily. SIGH. What annoyed me about this process wasn't spending the money, but the fact that I had to purchase jeans for her 2 sizes bigger than her actual size. Why, you might ask? Because the jeans that they had for little girls are cut like the jeans they have for GROWN WOMEN. I mean, skinny jeans for a 6 year old? What the hell does a 6 year old have use for skinny jeans?? And you know what's worse? The damn things have the nerve to look GOOD on her...
But seriously. What happened to children's clothing looking like it should be on a LITTLE person? Why is it that now, the clothing that should be protecting a child's innocence looks as if it's trying to bring it out prematurely? This phenomenon is one that I have never quite gotten. ...:smh:...
Moving right along...
A friend of mine made a comment today that kind of sat a little uneasily with me. It's not really her fault...I knew what she meant, but it just got me to thinking about how twisted our society is. When a person reaches a milestone birthday, it becomes a time to reevaluate what a person has done or not done, of how many "milestones" they have reached, in essence. Of late, the stigma is one or the other: Am I successful, married, and with/or without kids? or, Am I successful, have I avoided becoming a statistical single parent, etc. And so my friend, inadvertently, pointed out that our friend had not fallen victim to the single parenthood curse.
But why is it a curse? Ok, sure, I know that you are 'supposed' to have kids in marriage. But the marriage rate in this country right now is...hold on, lemme check...About 8 (7.6 to be exact) out of every 1000 people get married. So basic division and percentages...if there are over 300 million people in the US (304,059,724 as of July 2008, according to the US Census Bureau), that means that 67%(+/- 3%) of the country is married. But...about 4 (3.2 to be exact) of this same 1000 people are getting divorced. That's 40% (+/- 3%) of the same population. I could go deeper...but you get my point. Almost half of marriages in this country end in divorce. So with all that said...is it really better to be married, have kids, and play snake eyes at being together? Or is it better to be a single parent with guaranteed love? I mean, I know that's extra broad and a little generalized, but seriously...
Why is it seen as such a curse to be young and have a child? I have a 6 year old...I play hard and work twice as hard and I STILL spend most of my time with my baby girl...granted, I'm a little more tired than most, but it all gets done, and it CAN be done...so why is it seen as SUCH A CRIME? Did I sacrifice some freedom? Of course I did. But it's made to seem like such a negative thing...but if you look at some of the other things going on in society with my generation, I think this pales in comparison. Just some thoughts...
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Motherhood & Being Single on the Cusp of 30...and Children's Clothes
2 comments:
Every type of household has its flaws. Single parents have to work more and spend less time with their kids. 2 parent households may have 2 working parents and the TV babysitting the children. 2 parent households with one stay-at-home parent means the kids don't get to see the working parent that much. Kids that live with their grandparents have someone who is either way to strict or can't keep up with them. The list goes on. So its not a crime to be a single mom. I think most people just want the "best" for you and your little girl. It would be nice for you to have a loving companion to help take care of you. And it would be nice for your daughter to have a daily male presence in her life who loves her and her mom no matter what. I think that's what people mean when they say "not-so-sensitive" things.
And so what if most marriages end in divorce! My parents divorced when I was 17 and my brother 21. That had NO impact on our upbringing. What DID have a huge impact was the crappy relationship my parents shared while they WERE married. So to me, its worse for people to stay together just for the kids. And so what if people who are married for 25+ years decide to divorce...is that wrong? People change. And who says love is supposed to last forever?
Ramblings...
It's true. Like I told my friend, I understand what she was getting at...but there are a lot of people who say those sorts of things who don't mean it as nicely...
And I agree with you on the divorce thing, but I think it's just interesting that the value on marriage, or even commitment for that matter, is completely eschewed...
Post a Comment