Dying for Love

She held his gaze for as long as she could stand the intensity of it, then lowered her head and stared at the book cover. “Is the ending sad?”

“Very”.

Ella felt the heat of his gaze on the crown of her head. She felt the pressure of the walls, which seemed to be closing in, and the weight of air against her skin where it was exposed. Her throat became painfully tight.

In a low voice he said, “Even knowing the ending was sad, I wouldn’t have deprived myself the beauty of the story. Would you?”

      An excerpt from the book Rainwater by  Sandra Brown

One of the reasons that I never watched the movie Titanic was that I already knew exactly how the movie would end. I mean, who didn’t? Everyone knows the ending of the movie, as well as the real life story. The ship sinks. ‘Titanic’ became symbolic with ‘big, hulking, utter failure’ when it sunk on its maiden voyage. So when talking to a good friend of mine about the movie, and she goes on and on about how why there was only one door, why Jack couldn't be saved, I looked at her as if she had two heads. What was she talking about?

The ship sinks. The end. What Jack? What Rose?

Theatrics and fictional script writing aside, such is often the case with relationships that we know will not stand the test of time, not because of over analytically driven fears, but because of either foreseen or unforeseen circumstance. In the case of Jack and Rose, unexpected elements prevented their relationship from seeking its true potential. In the story I quote above, the main character falls in love with one of her boarders, for varying reasons, and sticks with him, even though she knows that he is dying of a terminal illness.


In the book I quote above, David Rainwater, a boarder in Ella Barron's boarding house in Texas during the Great Depression, comes to her with only mere months to live, a terminal illness (we realize later on that it is stomach cancer) shortening his life expectancy. The two eventually fall in love, despite Ella's hesitation based on David's condition. I rarely do romantic novels but I love historical fiction. Rainwater set me up, in  a way. I was expecting historical fiction - I got that and romance, but more important, a testament to endurance, strength, and true love. Rainwater encourages the living of life, despite knowing the potential negative outcomes, in this case, imminent death. 

Which brings me to this: could you do it? I mean, of course, it’s true; we all have to die sometime. But if you know that they’re dying? Could you continue on?  Or would the experience be too much for you to handle? I think that most people’s relationship fears stem from letting go and truly experiencing love – the good, the bad, and the ugly. Think about it – when a person talks about why they don’t want to be in a relationship, the number one reason is the fear of being hurt. However, if your significant other were going to die, and you knew this, it doubles the hurt factor.

But is it worth it? Perhaps the question you need to ask yourself is whether or not the experience, the love itself, is more important than the outcome. Are you willing to go through hurt in order to experience love?

So I ask you - could you see yourself pursuing a relationship with someone, knowing that they truly may not be here tomorrow?

Be honest…

Posted in: